Growing up

                                      Its already two years of engineering. I can't believe my juniors will have their juniors coming in. My SEs are BEs now. I'm living in my home for the past 20 years.20!! I really can't believe. 10th standard seems a lifetime ago. 

Growing up is just so weird. Birthdays come and go, you keep counting your age but you never realize these are years passing by. I can't believe that when a person looks at me, I'm officially an adult, not the child I think I am. Bhaji wale people take me seriously when I argue about the cost, not like some years back if I did the same, I would be laughed off and I would end up buying the vegetables at their quoted cost( although I doubt I'm good at bargaining :P). When I walk on the road, what I would think has changed gradually but to a great extent. It is obvious it would, but you never realize it changing, do you? If you actually compare yourself now with what you were even 5 years back, you will be amused. There was a time when saying you were in 10th standard was a big deal. There was a time where you didn't even know 10th standard was so important.  Graduation was always much much later. Those days, people 5 years older than you were someone you could never imagine yourself to be one day. Now you would just not be thinking of that cuz you don't want these years to run away.There was a time when I used to hear my parents talk to someone and they would say that their son is in engineering or medicine, I would think, hmmm that's a long time away. Now I'm halfway through and the fact is barely registered in my mind.


When you were a kid all of 6 years, a person a foot taller than you and salwar kameez would translate into an aunty, now maybe a kid might think that about me! My cousin's marriage is round the corner. The first marriage of our generation. and I am next. Of course, that doesn't come before much time later but that's how it always seems,doesn't it?


I realize I have changed only when I actually think what I used to think. A problem in 4th standard was deciding which group to sit with when you are good friends with both of them. Now a problem would possibly be "Do I want to pursue an MS in A or in B?Can I even pursue one". Funny these changes are.

It is always that everyone around you is changing, growing but you, nah, you're still the same. And for a person like me who really doesn't look at the mirror(serious, I ask my mother whether I look decent enough to leave the house), I was surprised one day when I saw my face and I could see my seriousness, maturity whatever you call it, but I wasn't that innocent 10 year old anymore. It sort of sinked in..


How those different aspects of life morph into something different slowly and gradually is growing up and it really matters what you are developing into. Of course, your parents are majorly responsible but there are certain aspects which totally lie in your hands. You can always choose, to be that person who you idolized, not be a spoiled brat who you might scorn and may not realize, you're one yourself.

I think I'm always gonna be amazed at how my thoughts have changed over the years. And they will keep changing....